A Halloween Not To Remember

Halloween. A day of dressing up, playing make believe and of course, getting candy.

That’s basically what my Halloween was like. Except, I dressed up for my mom’s funeral, made believe that it wasn’t happening, and the candy…well, I don’t have an analogy for that, I just had some candy later.

It felt weird to have a funeral on Halloween but that was the day that the church had available and obviously, paying respects to Mom trumped trick or treating. But, still I wanted to do both. Not because I am so into candy (I am, actually.) but because of the kids. I didn’t want to rob them of their Halloween. They are getting older and there are only so many more years that they will want to put on a costume and knock on a door. I didn’t want to take one of those years away.

So I made sure to bring up the costume idea days before. I told them that we wouldn’t have time to worry about it on the actual day. I emphasized that we needed to have costumes all ready to go and also made a mental note to buy candy as soon as possible.

But, despite the best intentions, I did nothing. The kids did have some ideas for costumes but I did nothing. Getting ready for the funeral and just getting through the days took all the energy I had.

On Halloween, festivities were far from my mind, but I couldn’t say the same for the kids. So Brian and I found ourselves heading to a thrift store after the funeral reception. Brian told them not to be picky and just grab something. I reminded them that it was hot, would be dark and any accessories would just be a pain to carry. I was totally in the spirit! 😉

Lizzie said she could be a secret agent. She grabbed a men’s black suit jacket to wear with a black shirt and pants. She also planned to wear Brian’s sunglasses. One down!

William looked for a suit jacket so he could be a Man In Black but ended up grabbing a Pokemon costume because as he put it, it was easy.  Two down!

Then there was Antwan. Antwan is always indecisive in situations when he needs not to be. He wasn’t interested in any of the options on the racks and racks of 1 dollar costumes. He was even less interested in any of my ideas. Just when I was starting to get frustrated, I remembered what day it was. So I hugged him. I told him that it was ok, it had been a difficult day and that this was just for fun.

We left with no costume for Antwan and headed to buy candy, Then Brian had the genius idea to get Antwan friendly accessories from The Dollar Tree so we bee-lined there. It was there that Neon Man or Random Man (depending on the moment) was born. He picked out glow necklaces and bracelets which he planned to wear over a black shirt so that it would look extra cool. He picked out an American Flag. He picked out all kids of other things but I cut him off. Three down!

Lizzie and I picked out a bunch of candy which turned out to be too much candy, as if there is such a thing, and we headed home.


We got home just in time to see a family walking away from our house. So naturally, I jumped out of the car like a maniac, yelling “I have candy!” and came running towards my slightly taken aback neighbors.

The kids went to their rooms and who are we kidding, their electronics. Ironically, I had to nag them down the stairs to go trick or treating. I get it, though, they had a long day, too. Anyway, they eventually came out in costume.  But, their inspiration had left them. Lizzie came out in a leather jacket with a red shirt and red sweatpants underneath. And no shoes. She said she couldn’t find the jacket (which turned out to be on the bookshelf in the living room). Brian renamed her biker chick and we went with it.

William put on his pokemon costume but never put the hood on.

And Antwan never changed out of his funeral clothes which included a yellow shirt (because it was my mom’s favorite color), stuck the glow sticks inside his shirt and stuck the flag in the ground.

Now normally, I would be a little more determined that they had respectable costumes but this was not a normal day. I regarded the fact that I was still maintaining at all to be a great victory.

For the first time ever and hopefully, the last, we sent the kids out on their own while we sat on the porch with candy. I really, really missed walking with them but not enough to summon the energy to leave my porch, ha.

There weren’t many kids out and according to my three, many people had their porch lights out. But since we have an insane amount of candy left, they are still in good shape.

Other years, I would have been disappointed but this year, I was just glad we all made it through, that the kids had a bit of fun on that sad day and that Brian and I had a little quality time as we fought off mosquitoes on our front porch.

Phoned in but still on the line


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