My Student Thinks I’m Scared Of Him

After the holiday break, we were expecting some of our Exceptional Education kids to have rough transitions back to the school routine, particularly one. And he did not disappoint. Well, I mean if we were looking forward to a rough week, then we weren’t disappointed.

He Doesn’t Like Change

I’ve talked about this particular student before who really struggles. It’s really no surprise that he doesn’t handle change well. So when his behavior was erratic upon return, no one was surprised.

He has been known to act out aggressively. It’s not due to behavioral issues, per se. He doesn’t fall into the Emotional Behavior Disorder Category. He has Autism and other things and when he acts out it’s not premeditated and he can’t stop himself from doing it again, even if he wants to.

Thankfully. up to this point, I have managed to avoid any full-on attacks, just some inappropriate grabs and knocking my glasses off. Funny how your perception changes. I just got the fact that I said “just.”

But, for whatever reason, I have now become the target. Maybe it’s because I’m not spending as much time with him since my new para (teacher’s aid) has taken the lead on giving him breaks outside of the classroom. Maybe he’s acting out to get out of the classroom. Maybe he trusts me enough to go after me. Who knows?

Two days in a row, he came for me. I am not a fan. Thankfully, I was not hurt. He did hit hard enough to knock the lens out of my glasses, though. I am eternally grateful that no one stepped on my lens and that when I realized that a lens was gone, my para was able to find it and put it back in the frame

What Is Behavior?

All behavior is communication. With his level of needs, it’s safe to say that he doesn’t completely know what he is trying to communicate. That’s why we have to figure it out.

Don’t Be Afraid Of The Communication

I have been told by my site coach more than once and then was told by my new para that I need to make sure that I don’t appear scared or take a step back when he comes for me, for lack of a better way of putting it. I wouldn’t say I’m scared but I do step back. I mean, how do you not, when hands are coming for you? I understand why I need to stand my ground but it’s easier said than done.

But, after that week, I was determined. I gave my family permission to surprise me with fake attacks so I could practice not reacting, haha. It was moderately successful and the kids greatly enjoyed it…😆 But when Brian “lunged” at on Sunday night to help me practice, I screamed and jumped; so I wasn’t feeling optimistic about Monday morning. 🤦‍♀️

But I did it!. On Monday afternoon, he tried to grab me. This time, I stood my ground, caught his hands and firmly said “no.”

It made absolutely no difference.

He still got hold of my hair as he was removed from the classroom. I was proud of myself, though!

The Reality

The reality is that he needs to be in a more specialized program but he’s not so it is what it is. Another reality is that whatever we were doing last week wasn’t working so we need to try something else. And yet another reality is that I will do anything I can to help him because it’s my job and I love him.