The One Where I Start Again

So, it's a new year. The beauty of that is the opportunity to start over. You really can do that any time but the new year gives you the extra encouragement that you need to really do it. Theoretically. I had a goal near the end of last year to post once at least once … Continue reading The One Where I Start Again

My Mom’s Eulogy

It was before she had to wear the oxygen mask most of the time, it was when she could still communicate fairly easily. But, it was after we all realized that this was not going to end well. So she started to make requests and plans for the funeral service and the future, in general. … Continue reading My Mom’s Eulogy

Facing Life With Grief.

Last week, I stood outside the church. I stood there for several minutes, just willing myself to go in. I like my church. I like the people inside. But, I don't like going in anymore because it reminds me of my dad. It doesn't remind me of his smile, his super loud laugh or his … Continue reading Facing Life With Grief.

Stuck In The Anger Stage Of Grief

So my dad is dead and I'm in the anger stage of grief and those angry emotions are constantly boiling right under the surface of my emotional skin. A handful of weeks ago, I was preaching to the kids that it's important to remember not to let the little things get to us and remember what's … Continue reading Stuck In The Anger Stage Of Grief

Daring Myself To Be Patient.

Love is patient. I can't think of many truer statements except maybe something like "chocolate is life." Or "Sleep is awesome," but "love is patient" is up there. I have a soft spot for the cliche and the verse that it comes from.  Brian and I used it in our wedding and we later scooped up this plaque when we saw it at … Continue reading Daring Myself To Be Patient.

Daring Myself To Love My Son.

A year or so ago, I received a book, "The Love Dare."  It was from my priest who is also my facebook friend.  She had read my angsty posts about Kaleb, met with me and then bought me the book.  The idea is that you are given a daily dare which is aimed at improving … Continue reading Daring Myself To Love My Son.

Wilderness Training For Kids

I know I've said this before but one of the things that we've always tried to teach the kids is to look at the bright side of things. Sometimes it's harder than other times but there is always a silver lining.  And I try really hard to find it.  One of my favorites is to … Continue reading Wilderness Training For Kids

I Wasn’t Ready For My Close Up.

So, I was at little Walmart as we call it.  (The one with just the food.)  It was an uncommon solo trip and as I was minding my own business, scanning my items, I looked up and I saw it!  A mirror!  An unforgiving mirror staring right back at me.  I was already aware that I wasn't my … Continue reading I Wasn’t Ready For My Close Up.

When Doctors Don’t Tell You What You Want To Hear.

Let's talk infertility! To me, it's like a dirty word.  It represents everything that I hate about myself.  And, yet, it is the thing that brought my children to me.  Because let's face it, what are the odds that we would have gone out looking to adopt if I had been popping out babies like seemingly … Continue reading When Doctors Don’t Tell You What You Want To Hear.

I’d Like To Buy The World A Goat.

Race is a funny thing.  You hear a lot of contradicting messages from the world.  Be colorblind.  Have pride in your race.  I don't see color.  You know how (insert race) people are.  Why do they segregate themselves?  There is no white privilege. That's reverse discrimination. (No such thing, by the way. It's all just discrimination.)I … Continue reading I’d Like To Buy The World A Goat.