Remembering To Be Kind

I work for Eldergrow. It’s a really cool program where I go into assisted living faciliites and do gardening related classes.

It’s incredibly fulfilling.

Anyway, there is a resident there. She is a real spit fire, as they say. If they still say that. She is sarcastic, snarky, and hilarious, She still smokes and has no time for my gardening classes. Although, sometimes, she will hang out and I’m always happy when she does.

So the other day when she came walking across the room. I asked her how she was doing. She said that she was terrible. When I asked her why, she said that she just lost her husband, that he had died the day before. I didn’t even know how to respond. I’m sure I mumbled something that I hope was appropriate as she continued to walk to a chair on the other side of the room.

Trying To React Appropriately

I was thrown by the whole situation, especially how no one else seemed thrown by the whole situation. I continued my class but I was mentally focusing on her. Aside from a smoke break outside, she sat in her chair for the duration of the class. On my way out, I went over to her, put my hand on her shoulder and told her I was sorry about her husband.

She thanked me and then I looked at the employee for confirmation of what I already suspected. She then low-volume explained to me that the resident’s husband died years ago but once a year, she remembers.

How tragically sad is that?

I said “Well, hopefully, she still appreciated the thought.”

And I’m sure she did because for her, this loss had just happened.

Be Kind To Each Other

I haven’t lost a husband yet but I have lost my parents and I can say that if I had to lose them over and over again, it would absolutely break me. It’s awful enough that they are gone in the first place and going through it the first times, was horrible enough for a life time.

Yet another reminder that we don’t know what someone else is going through so we should be kind to each other. There’s a certain lady that I know who is going to be getting an extra dose of kindness from me from now on.


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